Ignorance is a Plague

I never thought I would believe in Astrology, but a recent string of events has me believing that Retrograde Mercury is in fact a real thing, and that it's out to make my life hell. Nothing has been going right for the past few weeks.

There was a day last week that was just all sorts of awful and also relevant to this blog. I was walking down the stairs to the light rail, as I do every weekday morning. There were two women walking slowly down the left side of the staircase, so I decided to stay to the right to pass them. Apparently I wasn't moving fast enough for the guy behind me, who felt he was justified in using both hands to push me forward from behind to get me out of his way faster. Unlike me, he had a train to catch. Fortunately, I have a habit of always keeping my hand close to the railing, just in case I lose a battle with gravity (or, ya know, get pushed from behind by an inconsiderate douchebag in a suit, because that apparently happens more frequently than originally thought).

After I calmed down and stopped wishing horrible bouts of diarrhea on the guy (with lots of expletives in between), I started thinking about how glad I was that he pushed me and not someone else. What if it had been an old lady that he pushed? Or a pregnant lady? Or maybe someone else with a really bad medical condition who wouldn't be able to catch herself? Did he only have the guts to push me because he thought I was able-bodied enough to not get hurt? Or did it not matter, because I was a woman and wouldn't fight back anyway? None of this excuses the fact that he did it, of course. Some people are self-centered enough to really not care who they are hurting as long as they aren't inconvenienced.

Anyway, this goes back to the point I was making about invisible illnesses awhile ago. Just because a person seems healthy doesn't mean they are. And just because you're in a rush doesn't mean you have a right to inconvenience others, or make them eat concrete for that matter. I think we need to bring back those Victorian etiquette classes...

My Light Rail Dilemma

Every morning I have to take the Light Rail from Penn Station to get to school, and every morning I need to buy tickets for it. But first I need to stop and get myself coffee so that I can stay awake for class. So I go to Dunkin Donuts, grab breakfast and coffee, then proceed down the steps to purchase my tickets.

I buy two tickets at a time so that I have another one ready for the return trip. I use money that I take out each morning from my coin jar. I take that $1.40 in coins and stick them in the front right pocket of my jeans. Anyone who knows me knows that I hate digging around in my bag for my wallet, so I keep that money ready for a quick transaction.

I get to the machine, coffee in hand, and start tapping on the touch screen. Easy enough. But here's the hard part: I now need to get that $1.40 in coins out of my pocket and into the machine. You're probably wondering why I'm making a big deal out of something so simple, right?

Here's how this tends to go. I can easily pull the money out of my pocket. Now I have $1.40 in coins sitting in the palm of my hand. However, I don't have the dexterity to move the coins in such a way that I can accurately get them into the coin slot. So now I need to decide whether or not I want to take the risk of dropping all of the coins on the floor by trying to do this one-handed and fling the coins into the slot, or if I want to try to balance my coffee in between my arm and body to try and make use of both hands. You might be thinking, "Hey stupid, just put the coffee on the floor." I agree that sounds logical, but you're talking to someone that has a vendetta against all germ-y things. And let's face it, train stations and the like are germ-y places.

On especially stiff mornings, I don't attempt the one-handed technique. Instead I will use my right hand to grab the coins, place them in the palm of my left hand, and pick each coin up one by one.

And don't even get me started about what I have to do when dollar bills are involved in this process.

I envy all of you out there who don't need to put any thought into this. The movement just  feels too awkward for me. I'm thinking that maybe I need to start buying enough tickets on Monday to last for the entire week, but then I also have to worry about not losing them. Maybe I need some hand yoga. That exists, right?